So now that we’ve wrapped up “The 13 Days of Pan-demonium,” I think it’s safe to say you’re familiar enough with our resident Goth girl to know what she’s about—especially if you’ve bought a copy of BLOOD FEUD: THE SAGA OF PANDORA ZWIEBACK, Book 1. You have, haven’t you? (No, the book plugging never ends around here—we got books to sell!)

But where did the girl with the unusual name really come from…?

 FADE IN:

1. EXT: NEW JERSEY TURNPIKE – NIGHT

The hour is late on this warm summer evening, and traffic along the
New Jersey Turnpike is light and brisk. A light rain spatters down on
the asphalt, the droplets blurring approaching headlights, transforming
them into multipointed blobs of light.

Through the lines of traffic moves a Greyhound bus, the sign above its
large windshield proclaiming “NEW YORK” as its destination.

2. INT. GREYHOUND BUS – TRAVELING – NIGHT

Within the cramped confines of the bus sit no more than ten PASSENGERS,
all but two of them dozing in their seats. In the rear left-hand corner
of the bus sits PANDORA ZWIEBACK, an attractive, auburn-haired,
sixteen-year-old girl. Dressed in colorful, baggy clothing, a bright
green beret perched on her head at a rakish angle, Pan has the look of
a free spirit about her.

Pan gazes out the window and stares at the skyline of Manhattan, ablaze
with the lights of the towering buildings. Pan’s eyes seemingly light
up as she smiles broadly.

3. EXT: NEW JERSEY TURNPIKE – NIGHT

The bus continues on its way, entering the Lincoln Tunnel.

And that was how the original—and very different—version of Pan was introduced, in a screenplay called The Nightlife Ain’t No Good Life that I started writing in 1984 but never completed. (The title, BTW, comes from the song “Night Life,” written by Willie Nelson. I didn’t know that at the time; all I knew was that blues legend B. B. King sang the hell out of a cover version of it—look it up on YouTube.)

Inspired by the viewing of perhaps one too many movies by director John Sayles (Eight Men Out, The Brother From Another Planet), Nightlife was the story of a pregnant, teenage runaway who winds up at New York’s notorious Port Authority Bus Terminal, and the people she meets—no supernatural elements, just the character-driven tale of a troubled girl trying to make sense of her life.

“A troubled girl trying to make sense of her life.” Okay, so maybe not all that different from the Pan Zwieback of today… Well, except for the red hair and the unplanned pregnancy, of course.

So, why didn’t I finish the screenplay? I can’t remember; in fact, I’d forgotten all about it until I was cleaning up the basement a few years back and stumbled across the original typewritten pages and handwritten plot notes. Imagine my surprise when I realized just how long ago I’d come up with Pan’s name! 1984? Wow.

As for why “Pandora Zwieback”…

“Pandora” because the idea was that at the end of the screenplay, after all the troubles she’d been through, she’d still be hopeful about her future. “Zwieback” because…well, because I’d flipped open the dictionary toward the back and looked for a word that I thought would sound good when combined with Pandora. And I did like how “Pandora Zwieback” sounded.

So there you have it. Greek mythology + hard cookie = weird name for an odd but lovable girl who over the years evolved from pregnant runaway to Goth monster hunter—mainly because the name kept popping into my head as I’d work on various projects and I’d think, “Yeah, I should do something with that…” And then one day I finally did do something with it.

Not exactly the earth-shattering origin story you were expecting, is it?  😉

And this doesn’t even cover the brief time there was a second version of Pan, who was meant to appear in an adventure comic strip for the magazine Popular Science for Kids. But that, as the saying goes, is a story for another time…